Favorite Songs May 2025

Level Up by Love Ghost, Skold

Sacrilegious by Marilyn Manson

History of Violence by Theory of a Deadman

Junkies On A High by Green Day

A Mask of My Own Face by Lemon Demon

Ballyhoo by Green Day

Bad Habit by The Offspring 

Long Hard Road Out Of Hell by Marilyn Manson 

EAT by Poppy

Dead 2 Me by The Haunt

Bad Romance by Lady Gaga 

Team by Lorde 

Goodnight Adeline by Green Day

Pompeii by Bastille

Halloweenie III: Seven Days by Ashnikko

Fuck Off by Green Day

In The Air Tonight by Marilyn Manson 

Bloody Mary by Lady Gaga 

Animal by Mindless Self Indulgence 

Favorite Songs June 2025

Bed Of Roses by Mindless Self Indulgence

God Is A Weapon by Falling In Reverse, Marilyn Manson

Stay Young by Green Day

Barbie Girl by Aqua

Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen

Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da by The Beatles

Surrender by Cheap Trick

Losers Of The Year by Pinhead Gunpowder 

I Have To Look Up Just To See Hell by Marilyn Manson

Don’t Threaten Me With A Good Time by Panic! At The Disco

Take What You Want by Post Malone, Ozzy Osbourne, Travis Scott

The Oldest Profession by Skold

The Death Song by Marilyn Manson

Faster n Harder by 6arleyhuman

Leave A Scar by Marilyn Manson

Slave Only Dreams To Be King by Marilyn Manson

The Devil Beneath My Feet by Marilyn Manson 

You’ll miss me when I’m not around by Grimes

You Spin Me Round (Like A Record) by 3TEETH

Cracked Actor by David Bowie

Black Celebration by Depeche Mode

86 by Green Day

21 Guns by Green Day

Last Things by KMFDM

Where The Hood At by DMX

Everywhere I Go by Hollywood Undead

Blackout by Linkin Park

Patient Number 9 by Ozzy Osbourne, Jeff Beck

Good Riddance (Time Of Your Life) by Green Day

One Of Those Days by Ozzy Osbourne, Eric Clapton

Oceans by Frank Iero

Sexy Drug by Falling In Reverse

Just Another...

Brutalist beauty

Fascist liminality 

Mind palace with no key

Masculine disposition but in reality 

shows a femme fatality

Just another casualty 

visions of a blasphemy 

Better not to know 

It's not so much satanic

more psychically vampiric

Consciously unconscious crab bucket

So suck baby suck,

it's 

just another TV tragedy 

for online stream 

Don't you know? This is all a dream

Solipsism; wannabe Gnosticism 

Why would the CIA actually reveal if they suspected we could supernaturally interact with the simulation?

It's just a Gateway to lunacy and an extreme Kantian lack of any supposed rationality

It's lazy idealization

no different than blankly staring at a flickering wick 

Cutting tomatoes or even blowing a dick is more introspective than watching a candle

"Not really, check out [this] Instagram handle"

Modern or post

Personal thought seems so farcical

Knowing oneself to the point of forgetting it

Each move is a mental gamble 

Utilitarian is a fetish not an application 

Thought from the past restricting present action and as such negating future results of it. 

I Don't think I can suspend disbelief for this

 Some amount of time or recordings ago I was as per typically talking with Shane Bugbee.  On said occasion we got around to the (common between us) topic of AI and the development of artificial human companions. Now, I don't remember verbatim or what exactly was said but I disagree with Shane that these compatriots will end up equatable to an actual human. Naturally, this is mainly in sexuality. Scents imitated or not, you (or at least I) still have the mental notion: this is not human, this is a programed entity for my desires. In terms of a total environment, amazing at least in theory. Not really in my opinion. Sure humans are by way of nature and nurture, programmed-- it's a synonym. 

This being all based on personal understanding, based on myself I know and would know that said computerized comrade isn't human, and no matter how akin it can get it will be uncanny in those regards. There's no building with a robot, not in the same way a human is programmed. An artificial human companion in these regards is an ideal of the ideal being, a misanthropic replacement. In my head, it could never work, at least for me. 

I'll take the train to come back "home"

Where the heart is

what a shame 

it doesn't mean a thing 

Hot Summer Blowout

 It was a drudgy afternoon. Miserably the people marched about the day under the heat. Suddenly, a flash and the temperature spontaneously skyrocketed. In a moment, they couldn't breathe their sigh of relief.  

James Cameron doesn’t understand Oppenheimer

 A rebuttal by Claudia Berdella

James Cameron is stupid to think Oppenheimer did some sort of disservice in not reenacting the bombings of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The entire movie is about Oppenheimer, and the creation of the tool of destruction. Not the usage outside of the Trinity test and Manhattan Project at the time. It’s not a “moral cop out” or whatever it was he said, it’s realistic. Oppenheimer wasn’t present for either bomb dropping, but they could have shown when he visited years after the matter. That would tie it in better as i get what Cameron is trying to say, but he goes about it wrong. What would showing that do to Oppenheimer except make it into just another war movie where the pinnacle is the explosions, not underlying threat of self-made annihilation. The film already showed Robert grappling with his creation. Realistically speaking, it’s not some cop out by any means, if one reads American Prometheus which the film uses as basis, one would see that Oppenheimer wasn’t straightforward or consistent in his feelings towards his accomplishment, the movie reflects that (even if in an overly melancholic way) quite well.

Endless oblivion 

Mission: Nothing

no aim, no path, no train of thought un-fucked

Post modern alienation 

I’m a living radio station 

Tattoos I have (currently)

 

Identity as a crux

Maybe the crux off identity today is that identity today is itself a crux. There was once when a persons identity was relatively set. There was an ambiguity to it, but it was held up by the idea of these immutable foundations to ones being. There's no innate issue to that human beings are more abundant than was thought in prior times, generally speaking the more ambiguous the better. The issue it seems is that at a certain and unrecognizable point it stretches a person into an unstable void, so to say. A lack of basic, personal grounding, in flux as ever though it may be, is unsettled footing. The Divided mind is multifaceted in more ways than one. Who are you?

Torn pantyhose and used up clothes

Fragmented memory but it all shows 

It's not worth the mental expense

Fashion is more trustworthy than people 

Wrapped up to the nines, 

it does hide scarring lies

Clothing betrays, stains and strains 

Bleach bleeds marks away

End scene before the blade 

Rinses all intentional mistakes dow the drain

It's unique how death wipes slates clean

Intelligence & Wisdom

 A personally-based analysis by Claudia Berdella

Experience isn't intelligence. Intelligence is the capacity to have, adapt to the circumstances of said experience and understand the experience. Wisdom is only hindsight, but wisdom is nuanced as such

Case example: myself

I know a fair amount, I'm certainly intelligent. I'm not wise though, not really. People have said I'm wise for my age ("beyond your years" is often said), not really. Wisdom necessitates experience. My experiences, while there and I've definitely acquired some wisdom from them, are next to nothing. I look for nuance, simple as such (not really, but really). Intelligence is exploring the nuances, wisdom is the multifaceted lense afterthought. Or so I think. 

Time has come it is quite clear 

But Might was Right when Iran's missiles breaches the Iron Dome

Everyone is waiting,

based on ancient times

Or maybe it's just a death desire

When nothing is true you're all liars

They promised us forever but we got less

You promise forever and I get less

No turning around,

walking away-

Everyone craves an orgasm of abuse;

on precedentedly unprecedented magnitudes

But it's fine chief annoying orange has his attitude

Daddy issues trying to play father

Old motherfuckers,

if only the day of the pillow was universal,

for leaders not their feeders

But hey, 

what can I say?

I'm just as in anticipation for this overromanticized apocalypse 

Well, This Is What We Want(ed)?

  Well, This Is What We Want(ed)?

By Claudia Berdella

It seems that with current geopolitical disputes that the world is verging on a hypothesized, proselytized third world war. Russia, Ukraine, the US, Israel, Iran, Pakistan and France along with others are all engaged in conflict(s) which intertwine with international alliances of said countries. Escalated dramatically and all began clicking together by the breakout of bombardments between Iran and Israel in recent days after the latter assassinated a person of importance to the former. Alliances on both sides line up to set the stage for an intercontinental bloodbath. 

Such is just a general overview of what may be the official catalyst for the spectacle people simultaneously seem to want and will into being via self-fulfilling prophecy while not wanting to. In spite of that it is romanticized, even memed into a genuine possible reality. That is the nature of magic; willing something to happen, and in such a grand scale too. And what have we in the post-WWII landscape fetishized since? A trilogy. Fetish not being a positive or negative term here; people would likely prefer not to live through something as catastrophic as that, but still meme it to be. The bombs on the screens are only pieces of beauty on TV and a good distance reach from their projected destinations, just ask the remaining survivors in Gaza. 

The appeal here however is there, an orgasm that seems to be dying for release. Of course both in foresight and hindsight that it would be catastrophic, there’s never not an ethereal element to the idea of it being the last moments (not time specific: moment can be a few days or minutes or seconds in this usage) before annihilation. Israel has no issue fulfilling that dream, and wouldn’t it be fascinating to see?

It could backtrack the species technologically and socially a century or so, and maybe that’s part of the basis of this fetish. After all the proverb after the finale of the Second World War was that WW4 would be fought with sticks and stones. But maybe the basis for this apocalyptic fetish is an escape from reaping what we see. Or it is reaping what we’ve sewn, likely both. Sure there would be more work, more strenuous work to go around but at least Instagrams not in the picture anymore. So in a way the escape is from reaping the benefits of our own desires. Nonetheless, if WWIII occurs, remember: we wanted this on some unconscious level and consciously willed it into being, not simply the powers that be. 

See Philosophy: Who Needs It? by Ayn Randian chapter 6-- 'Selfishness without a self"

What do I believe?

Nothing, not in theory

I believe I believe nothing 

What do I believe?

Information is key

Why?

I believe information makes me free

Ignorance isn't bliss,

it's a void not an abyss

I believe 

I am naive 

A stream of mundane extremes

Present of property 

I miss misery

What do I believe when no one is around?

Not much different

just trimmed around the edges

Try not to go overhead

unsmooth hedges

Wrinkled shirt ironed stuff

It'll unwind in the water of mental abyss

Just a last thing cosmically adrift 

Not a mess

Not all there

Controlled chaos

Control is an illusion

Egotistical allusion 

Too often wants to play god and guardian

Why do I believe?

I prefer not to

Ideas are more concrete

despite being anything but

that's why I think

not believe.

Or so I believe, or think... What's the difference?

Temple of the Vampire, while understandable in the gist of it's credo "believe nothing, test everything" it seems like part of this Kantian subjectivity (at least from an Ayn Randian perspective-- see Philosophy: Who Needs It) which voids meaningful discovery. Belief is for what necessitates it. Beliefs (such as trying to live forever) are only useful should they be adaptive and beneficial, utilitarian. This however creates a very narrow framework for going about situations in life, except as a belief it's seen as a concrete opinion; concrete drys and traps the crutch of beliefs. One must imagine Sisyphus happy... fake it till you make it, so to say. Every belief is self-contradictory in that people are self-contradictory inherently but at the same time it's a syncretic contradiction.

What Would Anton LaVey Think About ICE Raids

 by Claudia Berdella

Ultimately, it's not able to be known what he would really think he is dead and you never know what is actually in a person's skull. That being said, I think it is safe to speculate on the topic (and I am not the first as this based on that prompt) given what the Doktor wrote and said while he was breathing. This is not what would, it's what might he think.

Many would assume given the bastardized misinterpretation of the text Might Is Right and it's resonating with LaVey's outlook after he discovered the piece of literary dynamite that he would be in full support of Trumps gestapo. It's true, LaVey was a man who liked the idea of having "an armed guard on every corner." However he was also a person who understood how scapegoating works. As an ethnically Jewish person growing up in the same world as Uncle Adolf had his office days in he did observe a commonly used example of the creation of a manipulated enemy. Not to mention, y'know he created Satanism as it's understood base tool is, and Satan, the rock n roll nigger of all history, is obviously the most blatant example of the creation of outsiders; the terms Satanism and satanist etymologically were slurs used to create and justify purging of outgroups. By his own admission he understood that on a political level as well-- "I would have been thrown into prison during the McCarthey purge [1951-1952] had I been of any prominence." It's like schools targeting alt kids even more after Columbine. 

On the flip, Trump is undoubtedly a Satanic president, probably the closest to a Satanist since Teddy Roosevelt. He certainly lives Might Is Right, just watch him give a handshake.

"Behind all Kings and Presidents--
                                    all Government and Law.
Are army-corps and cannoneers--
                                    to hold the world in awe..."

While true, and as evident with the current POTUS calling for the National Guard and threatening Marine involvement over people pissed off and frightened by his policies, this idea also states that liberty has never been won except by deeds of war, which is true. LaVey was a libertine, he did believe in people having personal sovereignty so long as they could handle it. LaVey may have appreciated Law and Order, but he also had a very healthy and valid distrust in government, but wouldn't lay sole blame on Trump, "People that blame leaders. I don't care whether the leader is someone like Stalin or someone like Hitler or someone like Manson or someone like a guy that happens to have a group of followers that will just simply-- like, Tom Metzger is a perfect example-- be blamed for what the knuckleheads it the dunderheads or the stupes do to, perhaps, overextended what they said. EACH LIVING BEING CREATURE, whether is is human or otherwise, should be held responsible for ITS actions." [Answer Me! issue 3 interview].

more on LaVey's politics here: https://claudiaberdellascorner.blogspot.com/2023/06/no-anton-lavey-was-not-fascist.html

Two recent conversations with Shane Bugbee

 

Liars, Lying and Hope, the most recent of the two being recorded the morning of June 6... Why is hope what we termed as a "strong lie"? I'm not entirely sure yet myself and I came up with it, so give it a listen and think thoughts.

SO, you're High as shit, so am I, here are some albums for the occasion

albums 

1. Ways Of Yore-- Burzum

2. The Pale Emperor-- Marilyn Manson

3. anything from Throbbing Gristle or Psychic TV, Death In June almost

4. MIGHT!-- NON

5. Satan Takes A Holiday-- Anton LaVey

6. Warning-- Green Day

7. The Nightmare Before Christmas soundtrack plus anything from Danny Elfman really

8. The Black Parade Is Dead-- My Chemical Romance

Livestream for 24 hours (or longer…) starting today

 

Joy, fun and seasons in the sun. 

Not completely

Just a long collage of continuous thought for free