4.22.2026

Raspberry-Sonne sonic stream,

Van leaves Via I-90

To (or) through Madison today

Sears tower behind for a later date

Illegal flavored vapes and flavored, 

failed array

“This arrangement is arranged”

Passing Wilson Avenue exit ramp-

Downing caramel flavored,

frozen coffee drink

Western wavelength;

Drill beat droning bass-strength,

Vibrational vocation:

Pseudo-sober elation,

Strained epiphany overconsidered…

Weakness is last strength;

Sly sleepy eyes, climbing over chairs—

Mummy-rust coughed up cat dust,

Sterilizing to stone soft

Guitar riff writes the sign-off

“So long and good-night”

Past-future lackluster

Hole-blown passion filibuster,

Salient synths singing serotonin;

Sick sound-silencer,

Building it up then burning it down;

Extended, condensed winter

Breaking in anticipation,

Engulfed undercurrent—

Cupid with a stuttering rotary turret

Repeat runaway:

Black-mage, egotistical empathetic sage;

Concerning, disintegrating 

Retention pace, vertigo space—

Reason rings the rope regardless,

even if out of respect:

Dearly departed stitch,

Obfuscating bad cadaver,

15mph toll racer

Pay at wanted risk:

Polar-predictable pricing—

Flagrant fragrance, knee-natural dog on a leash;

Nicotine sweet tea, 

Midnight nowhere road gleam

04.13.2026

One-fifty in the afternoon and I’m once again back in the cafe section of the second floor of Chicago’s monolithic Museum of Science & Industry drinking free coffee, courtesy of Shane’s membership. Blip of a discussion on the allure of such ‘special treatment’ for members, it’s a payed for image of privilege in a sense with the contained rewards. Reason to be here today, at least specifically isn’t completely clear beyond that it is a neat spot and wanting to get out more; like last night driving near the lake front and stopping by a park to walk its loop and smoke a joint before being interrupted by a vulture-esque tow truck shortly stalked the vehicle needed for necessary transportation at that night time of morning…

Talk turned to the enacting of plans; and then to the overlap between intelligence and malicious manipulations which are delegated out by more left leaning fellow travelers, namely from dominatrix related occupations where such psychological play is practiced to near perfection— which is why intelligence agencies often use sex workers as tools for psychological operations. 

Contemplation what to see here at the Museum it would seem what is left unexplored is the submarine. There is some Anne Frank one which sounds intriguing but not available to being seen at the current moment. Decidedly, the coal mine exhibition is what to do…

04.12.2026

Sitting in a corner restaurant in a town on the Chicago outskirts. What I can see outside the window before me is a brick wall surrounded by grass behind a street, lettering on it reads “ST JOSEPH UKRAINIAN CATHOLIC CHURCH. I take a bite of the hummus and olive oil dipped Middle Eastern gyro, it’s a scenic spot and from what I am told, everyone can read the room as to the reason for my being in Norwood Park Township and apparently fitting a gothic profile; and am obviously as such a true crime sight-seer passing through the neighborhood that once housed John Wayne Gacy…

The food I ordered— a falafel wrap and French fries— arrives at the table. Consuming half and from there back out to the car quickly dropping off the food, then heading next door. A smoke shop, I got a new vape— blue raspberry flavor from a brand called Mr Fog. Never heard of it or had it before but it’s the same as a Lost Mary…

…

Graveyard visited prior was quite a sight to scour through. Stone and buried bones in rows upon what seemed unending rows, eventually leading to a statue commemorating the Haymarket Anarchists as well as the notable headstone of the anarchist thinker Emma Goldman. Etched into the stones: names, dates and various recognizable sigils. Crosses, Freemason iconography and a communist hammer and sickle. Some of the Freemason grave markers have three letters carved with a pentagram: OES, which according to research signifies that of an adjacent fraternal organization called the Order of the Eastern Star; whose members typically consisted of the female family members of Masons, matching with what can be seen in the gravestones.

Carved into the back of the stone monument dedicated to the Haymarket puppeteers is the name of Louis Lingg. An eyesore, by my understanding of occult literature. Quick connection is to the Great Beast, Aleister Crowley, in his Book of Lies with a poetic piece titled with Lingg’s name. Tellingly the writing opens up explaining, “I am not an Anarchist in your sense of the word…” and wrapping up his contrarian to the contrarian claim by stating with a (personally perceived) Machiavellian lacing that, “every ‘emancipator’ has enslaved the free.”

…

Starbucks brand medium blend

Late-night data,

discussion about atomic arsenals,

international obliteration;

Scrolling sights of Seka—

A Flock Of Seagulls sings from Spotify

Omnipotent omission, disguised delusion:

Profound, propelled illusion,

Rock me Amadeus. 

Culpable

A million years yesterday—

Cross-crossing paths,

Unlasting and retained ridges

Culpable,

Forensic exposition,

Underlying exhibitionism

Too much too soon

Cautious option

Isolated optical illusion

Theosophy & Laundry

The final day of March 2026 and the occasional venture was a trip out to Wheaton, Illinois to visit the headquarters for the Theosophical Society of America. A bit over an hour to reach the destination by car, counting nearly becoming stranded from running out of gas until a Shell station finally appeared for it and some coffee. 

Getting to the location I was greeted with a scene which seemed right out of a Supernatural episode by its aesthetics coalesced together: overcast, greener surroundings and a red brick and stone building full of esoteric thought. Center of focus within the bricks being the Henry S. Olcott Library chock-full of archived Theosophical journals, pamphlets and racks of philosophical works from Blavatsky to Zoroastrian literature. 

In my browsing I was led along the walls to focus on a few publications which seemed of note. Most interesting of available material being that of a four volume collection archiving a journal publication called The Light Bearer from 1993 up until 2008. Flipping through it presents as largely Buddhist leaning streams of thought with degrees of (syncretic) Gnostic lacing and interpretation. An interesting title for what is presented; in most contexts the term 'light bearer' conjures up a Luciferian or Promethean ideal. Pipeline separating though with connection to Satanic or adjacent thought evident (as well as within Blavatsky's Doctrine) with comparative analysis. Satanism being the closest the West, or specifically the USA, can ever get to the Eastern philosophy; its means of attaining this Gnosis is via indulgence in the existence whereas Buddhism's enlightenment is through a negation of said desires; both going into the introspective results. 

A small hardcover pamphlet was the next item of captivation, A Theosophical View of Human Races. Short, brief and syncretistic bit it is a largely symbolic posit regarding the idea. Going about explanation by historical mythos such as Atlantis, Hyperboreans and Aryan's with a purported new (at the time of the pamphlet being made) American on the way; detailing that it is more to do with era's of existence and the evolution humanity has during said segment rather than an ethnological determination as with breeding, the species is technically always evolving. In a sense the view given is akin to that of Mark Fishers' conception of 'disidentity politics': a fluid form adopted as method to dennunciate the dissatisfying institutional impositions. It's reminding in the Theosophical sense of a personal omnipotence, or elevated consciousness-- spiritual enlightenment; while Fishers' would be more hardline agnostic sociopolitical, awoken and reasoned with more of a depression. 

Lastly looked at in the Olcott Library was a small hard leather covered translation of The Book of Devotion from the Bhagavad Gita; and then a larger red book which was an exploration of power through a Hindu lense, which I find to be of so much interest I plan on returning soon to read it through...