At exactly a quarter past 3pm yesterday (January 7, 2025) a call came through to me, leading to an awry ran and interesting, to say the least, venture. On the phone calling, my friends Jorgio & Harley with their dog Monkey; who had been hired as help for an aging man’s ranch as extra hands about an hour away from my place of work where we first met around a year ago this time. This was however an unpleasant situation wherein the older gentleman hiring them was essentially spinning false hopes, exploitation of some homeless people more or less.
From that I contacted a person named Victor, as he unlike myself is with vehicular transportation. My Subaru Outback unfortunately kicked the bucket about a month and a half prior (after 13 years, for the most part on the original battery no less) which created a small conundrum in the escape attempt later…
Driving 40 minutes solely to get me in the debacle, a quick $26 worth of gas and officially embarking off to the soundtrack of Boston’s 1976 self-titled album.
Looking like a scene from Seattle the sky was steadily letting itself down onto the town below, we eventually arrived to the dirt road of damn-near-damnation.
Driving in a Kia, little more need be highlighted how terribly those cars are in regards to being sub-par in all-terrain performance. We made it all but about 75% of the way to the ranch before having to stop so as to not bottom out the automobile. Getting out after pulling to the side, I walked the remainder of the 15 minutes to the ranch gate, finding Harley & Monkey. One would think of it simple from there. One would be of course, wrong, or there’d be less interesting of a story to note down.
Their stay at the ranch culminated in an attempt at normal diplomacy as one would when moving from a property not theirs, Jorgio attempted sophisticated interaction with the man. Such got a .22 drawn on him. Claiming that Harley had stolen a spoon and plate, somehow…
From there it was get the fuck out of dodge. After an hour and a half of back and forth in the rain trying to get one of the dogs back onto the ranch and the Wonder Twins (plus Monkey) finding their way in the pitch black to the car. Arriving back to a concerned Victor sometime closer to 7:14 at night it had luckily stopped raining. Had it continued the dirt road likely would have flooded and stranded us all. Not being the case however we were off.
Culminating finally in a quartet performance of us all singing along to Queen’s We Are The Champions after stopping by a dispensary to pick up a few celebratory joints. From there Victor and I dropped the three off at a Bashas they have some niches around; then went across the street to the gas station I work at for a few free drinks (courtesy of my employment), cleaning stuff for his back seat, and a cookie.
Getting back home from there to sit back down at the desk where it all began some 6 hours before. Situating some creepily cute antique dolls Jorgio handed off for me to hold; together they’re worth some $3000 total. A cool find from a month ago. There to write this tale from the day.
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